“While I know they had many other patients to look after, it really felt like they were only there for us.”

Dr Mich Page reflects on her time at the hospice with her husband Bob.

When people telephoned our house and asked to speak to Dr Page, it was a source of amusement for both of us to say, ‘which one? Do you want Dr Mich or Dr Bob?’

We met at university, and I was massively impressed by Bob taking me on a picnic, out onto the sand-dune system where he was conducting his PhD research. From his battered old rucksack, he produced plates, glasses, triangular cucumber sandwiches, strawberries and a bottle of Asti Spumante. I remember thinking, ‘wow, this man could be the father of my children’! And that was the beginning of a romance that lasted for the rest of his life.

Bob began working for the Hampshire and Isle of Wight Wildlife Trust, in 1997, shortly after the first of our two daughters was born. He progressed from conservation officer to CEO as the Trust grew, both in size and importance. However, Bob had to retire early when he was diagnosed with bowel cancer. After prolonged stays in hospital and many operations, spanning some eleven years, he was still doing OK, enjoying life, playing with our three grandchildren, and actively engaged as a volunteer for the Trust. But suddenly, in 2023 he got ill again and was diagnosed with Lymphoma.

After an operation and time in hospital, the doctors decided to stop treatment, and told me that Bob would be better off with hospice care. I knew that he would be more comfortable there as he would no-longer be disturbed by bleeps, flashing lights and the noises of busy nurses coming and going.

Our two daughters and I accompanied him and immediately the hospice team jumped into action to make Bob comfortable, and they did that in so many little ways, and it was these little things that made such a big difference. The staff washed and shaved Bob, combed his hair, and made him ‘cosy’, but more than that, they put his medical drip into a pretty cloth bag, and there was a handmade quilt on his bed. It all looked ‘homey’. The big window by his bed looked out over the garden with its huge rock, water cascade and flowers.

On the wall of Bob’s room was a large picture of St Catherine’s Hill. This was one of the Trust’s reserves that Bob had worked on and indeed, we had both been there a few weeks before he died, looking for butterflies. Although Bob couldn’t speak by then, he could see this picture and I know that he recognised it. It was so meaningful to us all and felt like this room was where we were meant to be.

After just three days in the hospice, Bob died, a few days after his 74th birthday. All three of us had been able to stay with him, day and night. The staff were there when we needed to talk to someone, they encouraged us to speak to Bob and to talk to each other. While I know they had many other patients to look after, it really felt like they were there for all four of us, making sure we were OK, not just Bob.

Before going home, we called our parish priest to come and pray with us. Then with formalities over, we went back home to Romsey, for hot chocolate and reminiscences. We knew that Bob’s last days had been made as comfortable as possible, but more than that, they had been peaceful.